But when I don’t tell someone else about it, it continues to eat at me and eventually spurs me to action.
What does staying stuck in that resentment really accomplish, anyway?
It’s pretty extreme, and this couple had already tried all sorts of other avenues to get back on track. For this woman (who speaks her mind openly and freely almost all the time, as far as I can tell), it was right for her.
Here’s an example of extreme renegotiating: I was recently talking with a woman who I knew had been going through some bumps in her marriage for quite some time.As other readers chime in, you’ll also get a wider range of advice.If you’d like more detailed advice on the steps I took to reboot my own marriage, please take a look at my book . We did everything for the kids–they slept with us, all of it–and there was never any time just for us. Don’t, for god’s sake, forget that your relationship needs to be watered, too. I’ve been thinking a lot about forgiveness lately, and how exactly it is that we forgive. Looking back, I can’t believe how much time and energy we were wasting being resentful. That’s not to say that we won’t cross this bridge at some point again in the future–I’m sure we will.4) Decide you’re going to stay married, no matter what. Say it out loud and figure out what you need to do to both agree to it. And I’ve come to the following conclusion: we just do. Here’s the craziest thing: once Ken and I decided to just let go of our resentments and forgive each other, it was simple. Life is full of challenges, especially when you’re married with young children, that’s just how it goes.